The last time you pushed me away was the day I completely stopped trying to fix you.
I poured every fiber of my being into you for several years.
I assembled you back together delicately, piece by piece
Only to have you smash us both into smithereens, not caring where you scattered me.
You spent several years obliterating every single piece of me
Making sure there was no way it could be repaired
Just so I could feel how it felt to be completely broken.
Everytime I tried to make you whole, you dragged me down with you.
I never cared that I was irreparable.
I only cared about trying to repair you.
I feel like it’s my fault we’re broken into a million pieces.
I tried to be the glue that held you together
But I never knew I needed to physically hold you together to make sure you stayed.
You made me believe you could fix yourself on your own.
I thought I could fix myself on my own too.
I thought you didn’t need my help because everytime I tried, you demolished me even more.
You pushed me away to the point of no return.
I don’t even know if I should come back this time.
But I have a feeling if I don’t, you’ll destroy yourself until there’s nothing left.
And everyone will blame me for not being there to make you feel complete.
I wish we weren’t this dependent on each other.
I wish there was a way we could feel complete without each other.
But we’re the only ones that know how every single piece of each other fits
And we’re the only ones that can make sure they don’t fall apart again.
No one else has the same amount of strength we do to be able to hold us together.
But since you won’t let me fix you anymore, I don’t know what to do.
You’ll just cut yourself on the jagged edges trying to put yourself back together.
It won’t stick unless I’m there to hold it permanently.
I’m getting tired of holding on.
I’m getting tired of the glue wearing off.
I’m getting tired of watching you demolish yourself repeatedly.
I’m getting tired of being knocked down with you.
I don’t know what to do anymore.
I just want it to stop.
I just want you to let us hold each other together.
I want you to let us fix ourselves so we never have to shatter again.
I can’t keep doing this by myself.Irreparable (via makemefeelsafe)